Law & Order: SVU star Mariska Hargitay was brokenhearted when Peter Hermann ended things between them during their dating life.

Mariska Hargitay has been playing Olivia Benson for years in Law & Order: SVU. The show brought some great things into Hargitay’s life, including the Joyful Heart Foundation. However, the best thing she found on the show was her future husband, Peter Hermann. In the third-season episode, Monogamy, Hermann appeared as defense attorney Trevor Langan for the first time.

It was the beginning of a relationship that would complete two successful decades of marriage. They began dating in 2002, after Hermann’s first appearance on SVU, and got married in 2004. However, the two years in between weren’t all magical for the couple, who were hit with some hard realizations.

Peter Hermann gave Mariska Hargitay heartbreak before the Law & Order: SVU stars got married

Mariska Hargitay and Peter Hermann in Law & Order: SVUMariska Hargitay as Olivia Benson and Peter Hermann as Trevor Langan in Law & Order: SVU | Credits: NBC

When Peter Hermann finished filming his first Law & Order: SVU episode, he went to meet Mariska Hargitay in her dressing room. Hargitay recalled their first meeting for Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue’s book, What Makes a Marriage Last. She shared, “You came into my dressing room. Nobody does that.”

They realized that they had something special after their conversation. They connected on a deep level after a long talk about God. She shared, “And then we talked for like three hours about God. That’s where the conversation went.” She shared that she didn’t want to leave at the end of that episode.

While their initial few dates were magical, the couple quickly came to the realization that they both had different expectations from the relationship. It was a rough road for some time after that. Hermann shared in the book, “We saw the world differently. You end up opening your heart fairly wide when you marry someone, so I was proceeding with great care, sort of inching my way forward.”

Their different expectations even caused them to break up. Hargitay remembered that their relationship broke apart during Thanksgiving. She shared:

Hermann needed more time, and they went without speaking for three months. Hargitay shared that she was “brokenhearted”. She also recalled the day when they reconciled:

Hermann soon proposed to Hargitay. He told PEOPLE that he realized he wanted to marry her when he saw her during her 40th birthday with all the people she loved. They got married on August 28, 2004.

Peter Hermann reveals the secret to their successful marriage

Peter Hermann passing a document/letter to Mariska Hargitay in Law & Order: SVUMariska Hargitay as Olivia Benson and Peter Hermann as Trevor Langan in Law & Order: SVU | Credits: NBC

Peter Hermann has a very simple answer to the secret that kept the couple together for two long decades. He told PEOPLE in 2019 that their secret to a successful marriage is laughter. He shared, “I never thought I would have this much laughter in my life.”

The Blue Bloods actor called his partner “the embodiment of laughter—of joy.” He shared that he and Mariska Hargitay always found their way back to each other, even if they disagree on something. He explained:

Hargitay gave birth to their first child in June 2006. They named their first baby son August Miklos Friedrich. In April 2011, Hargitay and Hermann adopted their daughter Amaya Josephine. Later in October 2011, they adopted their son Andrew Nicolas.